Every Pot Has A Lid

For a while now I've been contemplating creating a new blog dedicated to the realities of being single, somewhat older, Mormon, and living in a small town with very limited dating options. Because who doesn't want to read about that right?! I've hesitated starting this sooner because I didn't want it to turn into a another bitter single girl ranting about why boys are stupid and whining about why don't they like me and yada yada yada. That is not my intention. That being said, I can't guarantee that won't happen from time to time, but again it is not my intention for this blog. I'd like to provide a realistic look at the highs and lows of being single. It's safe to say I experience both perspectives daily. Will anyone read these thoughts? I don't know. But here I go...

Earlier today I clicked a link someone had shared on Facebook for a YouTube video made by Amy Poehler. I expected it to be funny and make me laugh, but instead it really made me reflect on my perspective about my body. I've often thought/felt my body is the reason I'm still single. If only I were a few sizes smaller surely I would have met some guy who would love me by now right? Even tonight, I took Lola to the dog park and there was a pretty attractive guy there with his 3 dogs. Right off the bat I took myself out of the game and avoided any possible interaction with him. Why did I do that? I did it because I felt he was more attractive than I was, so surely he wouldn't even think about interacting with someone "like me". What?! It's like I've been duped (perhaps by myself) into thinking that my body is all I have to offer. Now looking back I can see how stupid I was for selling myself short in that instant.

Let me be clear about one thing. I do not have a self-esteem problem. Grammar and punctuation problems? Sure, I've come to terms with those, but I'm good when it comes to self-esteem. I actually thinking pretty highly of myself (probably too highly) in most aspects of my life. I'm proud of my accomplishments up to this point and look forward to meeting and exceeding other goals I have for my future. I think I have a lot of great qualities, but I do worry that no one will ever take the time to learn about those parts of me. And sure, there will be people I meet along the way who may pass me by because of my body. To be fair, I know I'm guilty of doing that with some guys as well. But this brings me back to the YouTube video. As funny as it sounds, Amy Poehler has helped me looked at myself in a different, more positive way.  I've included the video here because I think she has some really good points about body image and learning to love the things we have been given.




I just really love what she said there. I know that I have my little "tape" that plays over and over in my head. I've gotten really good at picking out my flaws - both physical and personality flaws. I think it's time to stop using that tape. It's time to move on to a new series of tapes where I appreciate not only the positive things about me, but also learn to accept and love my not so great features as well.


In the end, I want to end up with a guy who loves my tree trunk thighs. With someone who uses my love handles to pull me closer to him. I want to be with someone who tells me I'm beautiful and isn't lying. I do deserve love. And I'm willing to wait for it. Thanks for the reminder Amy.